Angel visits

The other day I went to see a friend - someone who has been an inspiration, a mentor, a healer, and a motivator in my life and my journey through grief. I was telling her that I've been having trouble with staying motivated and haven't been running regularly, so she suggested that I run the Starlight run again this year. After all, it was the run that got me started in the first place. Two years ago, I ran it on my best friend's birthday. As the day went on, I was thinking about our conversation and I remembered this passage I'd written a few weeks before my first 5k. I'm looking forward to a few fun ABBA inspired runs as I get ready for the next one... and it never hurts to have an angel cheering you on.

May 26, 2010

Last night, I went out for a 3 mile jog, preparing for the 5k Starlight run that I’m running in my best friend Rochelle’s memory on June 5 (also her birthday). As I was leaving my house, I chose the ABBA gold album to be my running partner. ABBA always reminds me of my best friends Rochelle and Shauna, and the hours we spent driving around our hometown singing at the top of our lungs more than half a lifetime ago.

About two miles into my jog, I was really starting to feel tired. I was thinking about Rochelle, half wondering what she thought of my crazy plan to run a 5k on her birthday. I mean, it’s not something she would have ever done. I’m doing it for myself, my health, dumping my sweat, grief and emotional baggage on the road and leaving it there. The Starlight parade will follow, and Rochelle enjoyed a good parade, so I imagine her silliness, playfulness, and happiness will be with the crowd that night.

Anyway, as I plodded along, feeling weary, this song came on. For the first time in many years, I listened to the words. Heading up that shady wooded path, I started to smile. My breath felt easier, my feet felt lighter, and by the time the second verse started right at the 2 mile mark, I was smiling and laughing as the line “pushing through the darkness still another mile” tickled my ear drums. I couldn’t help but feel that this was Rochelle’s way of letting me know she approves of my crazy plan, she believes I can do it, and that she’s looking forward to the parade on her birthday.

I do believe in angels. My best friend is one.

"I Have A Dream" (Abba)

I have a dream, a song to sing
To help me cope with anything
If you see the wonder of a fairy tale
You can take the future even if you fail
I believe in angels
Something good in everything I see
I believe in angels
When I know the time is right for me
I'll cross the stream - I have a dream

I have a dream, a fantasy
To help me through reality
And my destination makes it worth the while
Pushing through the darkness still another mile
I believe in angels
Something good in everything I see
I believe in angels
When I know the time is right for me
I'll cross the stream - I have a dream
I'll cross the stream - I have a dream

I have a dream, a song to sing
To help me cope with anything
If you see the wonder of a fairy tale
You can take the future even if you fail
I believe in angels
Something good in everything I see
I believe in angels
When I know the time is right for me
I'll cross the stream - I have a dream
I'll cross the stream - I have a dream